In 2006 I left my home in Georgia and all that I knew there and moved to NC. Something I really didn’t ever want to do, but God had another plan for me. I arrived in NC during the summer & new I had to get a job to stay where I was staying, so I did just that. I of course being the friendly person that I am met people easily. I worked at a car dealership so meeting people was an every day job. I also was next to a huge military installation. So I befriended a lot of military folks, one in which a few months later I would be celebrating their birthday with,with a group of people. We ended going to a local club I of course being under age didn’t really like the idea but went anyways to still celebrate. It was jammed packed of course and finding a table was almost impossible. So I scanned the room and found a table with just two guys I then went over and asked politely if my buddies and I could share their table to celebrate his birthday. They said yes.
We sat down and conversation started flowing left and right. Now at the time I had no idea that was sitting across the table from my future husband. I wasn’t even interested in dating anyone at the time, my focus was my job. As the night progressed I befriended both guys, long story short. I hung out with them( & their group of friends) more often- through the up coming of days & months. Now in the back of my mind, dating a military guy was never really something I wanted to do. I knew very little about the lifestyle, & main thing was that they would be gone a long time here & there.
So I was friends with my husband for a long time prior to dating. I’ll never forget this conversation I’m about to tell you about.(grin) So one day while I was at work I got a call from James, He called and asked if I would go to the beach with me. At first, it took me back because I didn’t know he was interested in me like that. There had been plenty of flirting on both our parts a bunch of times in the past but I didn’t know he wanted to pursue anything. Then I had a red flag go up in my head, no no don’t get emotionally involved he’s military he could deploy- all of these things were running through my head. I finally responded back and said I don’t know if its a good idea. He then went on by saying if it makes you feel more comfortable there will be other people there with us. So I went ahead and agreed. I had the best time.I still think about that conversation from time to time and wonder to myself what I was worried about?.Its not like I had just met this person, we were already friends. We started to talk more often with over the phone, then we would meet more often in person,we clicked instantly. We had fallen head over heals madly in love with each other. Now I have had lots of different feelings for boyfriends and what I thought was love then, but boy was I wrong til I met James, that was real love the kinda love people hope for and search for. We connected on a deepest level one can connect, he in all honest was my other half, the opposite of me in every way. He was my best friend my soulmate, my everything.
We both knew what we had in each other, I remember going back to our first kiss, it was the kinda kiss you would want to last forever and man did I want it too!! I couldn’t fight the feelings I had for him and I knew my life would never be the same. He proposed to me August 17th 2007 & I was happiest girl in the world x 1000. I was marrying the man of my dreams. We got married Oct. 8th 2007 This was also the same time that he graduated from the course and became a green beret. I was so happy for him!! he had worked and trained over a year to earn the special forces tab. After we got married we bought our first home we moved in valentines day 2008, Words truly can’t describe how happy I was. As the weeks went by we started having more conversation’s about the upcoming deployment. I would try to change the subject or avoid it because it made me sick to my stomach thinking about it( he was trying to prepare us for it ). I didn’t want to be away from him. He didn’t want to be away from me. & his work performance at the company took the hit for it, He wasn’t the same and neither was I when I was work, we couldn’t focus. One day I got a call from his company team sergeant he asked me to come by the company, so I did, when I arrived James and Sean were outside he asked me if everything was ok, I said sure, then asked me about the deployment and asked me if i wanted James to deploy or not, he went on by saying he’s worried about this just as much as you are and I want to make sure every one’s on the same page to move forward with this deployment. I didn’t know at the time I had the option of him not deploying. I knew how hard he worked and trained to be where he was and I wasn’t going to be selfish and say yes keep him back because I’m scared of this deployment. So as that was running through my mind, other words came out my mouth. As a wife I was scared yes but I wanted to support my husband in every way so with that said. I came to decision then & there and said I’m ok with everything and the deployment. Even though deep down inside it hurt me and it wasn’t the truth!!!!
Few more weeks went by and my birthday came up( April 1st) now his deployment was in May 2008 He was scheduled to be in training( out of state ) during that time. Well like I had said before we didn’t like to be apart and we weren’t going to start now.
He called me and said get your bags packed your coming with us( him and I and 2 other folks) yes, this was kinda behind the army rules and regulations but when you love someone and want to be with them whats the harm right? well we enjoyed our getaway together even tho it was kinda work related lol. Later on that month because deployment was around the corner the guys had time off to spend with there families and lots of it. It was great we left all our worries behind and enjoyed our last few weeks together before mid may.
I remember the night before the day he deployed we watched a movie called dusty It was the first time I had seen it and he insisted we watch it and I’m glad we did because at the end he turned to me and started to sing the ending song. It went like it.
Our love is unconditional
we knew it from the start
I see it in your eyes
you can feel it from my heart
from here on after
we’ll stay the way we are right now
and share all the love and laughter
that a lifetime will allow
I cross my heart
and promise to
give all I’ve got to give to make all your dreams come true
in all the world, you’ll never find
a love as true than mine
you will always be the miracle
that makes my life complete
and as long as there’s a breath in me
ill make yours just as sweet
as we look into the future
it’s as far as we can see
so let’s make each tomorrow
be the best that it can be
and if along the way
we find the day it starts to storm
you’ve got the promise of my love
to keep you warm
in all the world
you’ll never find
a love as true as mine
a love as true as mine
I of course had tears flowing. I was dreading the next day and wished that time would stand still, Its hard saying goodbye the first time around but try having to say goodbye a few times! I remember arriving at the hanger and all the families there, they all looked miserable and I wouldn’t blame them I felt the same,all I wanted to do was burst out into tears but I kept smiling for my baby. They had set for time and we were all hanging around the area until the time came about. Because of a storm that came through they announced until the storm clears for take off your free to go, so we left it made me feel somewhat peaceful inside that I had my man and we were leaving that dreadful area, in all honesty I wanted the storm the stick around long term!! with that extra time( 3 hrs) we enjoying a lunch with some of our family and more personal time between the two of us privately. It was nice & I wanted it to last forever but as soon that cellphone rang my happiness was taken away cause I knew it was time, it was time for us to head back and for him to leave.
The closer we got to base, the slower I felt that we were driving & I felt sick to my stomach. He took my hand & grasped it firmly and kissed it. & held it all the way there. As we arrived they asked all the men to line up in 2 straight lines, I of course went where James was so I could still see him. The leaders were announcing things I of course couldn’t here them. I tuned it all out I suppose but as i stood there, with the two of staring at it each other, we could tell our hearts were breaking. He motioned to me to come to him, whether I was suppose to or not I didn’t care I went anyways, He wrapped his arm around me(both tearful), he then said with a broken voice I’ll always love you, & I’ll come home. I stayed in his arms until the men started walking out the hanger onto the airplane. People left after all the men were on the plane I & a few others(families) stood there & waited until the plane took off. I was so sad when got back to our car. I cried for a good 30 minutes It was safe to say I couldn’t drive. After I arrived home I went to bed. I knew he was planning out emailing or calling me as soon as he got were he was going & he did. He stopped to two locations in the U.S before going to Kyrgyzstan then Afghanistan. We talked everyday sometimes it was emails and sometimes it was calls, either way we never went a day without some sort of communication. He was deployed 6 weeks before the accident. & I spoke to him hours before accident. I remember him saying in that conversation you know I love you right?.. I found it strange because of our history. I responded with a yes and how much I loved him back.
The next morning is a bit of a blur. It was fairly early & our dog, Lela, was barking & it woke me up. I looked at the clock & it said 6/ 630am. I couldn’t imagine who could be at my front door at this hour I thought my self as I was getting something on to greet them. I remember looking through my peep hole through the door & seeing two men in uniform. I then dropped to the floor slowly and kept saying “don’t do this to me”, over and over. They kept asking me to open the door for them to talk to me but i couldn’t move for what felt like eternity(10 mins). I kept saying “I just talked to him, I just talked to him.”. finally with no strength, I opened the door & from that point on I don’t remember much. It’s the hardest thing anyone will ever have to go through, I’ll tell you that.
It’s been 3 years since my husband, James Treber, passed away, & there’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think about him. After everything happened I went into a deep depression, stopped eating, pretty much not caring about my own life. I just wanted to be with him, because a life without him was not a life I wanted to live. For 6 months I was on a downward spiral. Through lots of counseling & prayer I can sit here today and tell you our story. I have moved forward with my life and try to be as happy as one can be. I miss him so much and will love him all my life. I met an angel when I met James and I was blessed to have him in my life.